Self-help – Carol's Notebook

You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero

September 17, 2020September 18, 2020 by Carol2 Comments

If I had to guess, I'd say most people either hate or love this book. I feel like it's a hard one to be meh about. There is nothing new here. These lessons can be found in other self-help books and pop cultures. We are capable of manifesting our world. The basic idea is that our thoughts create our world to a large extent and for most people, our self-doubt does get in our way. When we let our insecurities rule, it can be difficult to think we deserve something and so we end up sabotaging ourselves. The thing is, most of her stories she says, she talks about the universe helping her out, but her friend set are well-off people who have means. She may be vibrating on a high level, but it helps that she's safe. If she buys a car she can't afford, she will not go hungry. If she can't find a place to rent,...

Happy Money by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton

June 5, 2020June 5, 2020 by Carol6 Comments

Happy Money was referenced in the Coursera class The Science of Well-Being, which is why I picked it up. From the class, I already knew the basics of what Happy Money was going to discuss, but it was still interesting and worth reinforcing. The authors are both professors and share a lot of their research, but they've tried to keep it enjoyable too, sharing amusing stories and funny tidbits. Its goal is to help readers learn to spend money in ways that will make them happier. It also touches on businesses and even countries and how they can help their employees/citizens become happier people. Basically there are five principles. Buy experiences rather than material objects.Treat yourself. You enjoy things more if they are occasional treats, rather than everyday things. That one latte a week will make you happier than having one every day.Buy time. Consider how any given purchase will affect your time.Pay now, consume later. Waiting for things makes them...

Rethinking Positive Thinking by Gabriele Oettingen

May 15, 2020May 15, 2020 by CarolNo Comments

I mentioned before that I've been doing The Science of Well-Being class on Coursera. Another book the professor, Laurie Santos, mentioned was Rethinking Positive Thinking by Gabriele Oettingen, and she interviewed the author for one of the segments, so I picked it up. If I spend 80% of my reading this year on mysteries and being happy, I think that'll be a good year. The blurb above gives a good summation of the book. Oettingen and others have done a lot of research on wishes, how they affect our actions, and what helps us achieve or not achieve them. She shares the results of a lot of studies, mostly college kids - who are probably the easiest to recruit - but other groups too. She also shares individuals' experiences, people she's worked with through training sessions or friends. Interestingly enough, the science demonstrates that it is not necessarily helpful to fantasize about achieving some wish because it makes us feel relaxed, and thus...

The How of Happiness by Sonja Lyubomirsky

April 15, 2020May 15, 2020 by CarolNo Comments

I've been doing The Science of Well-Being class on Coursera, and one of the books the professor, Laurie Santos, mentioned was The How of Happiness by Sonja Lyubormirsky, so being the person that I am, I picked it up. According to Lyubomirsky, 50% of your happiness level is genetic, you can't change it. By nature, you have a set happiness point that may be higher or lower or right on track with the average. 10% of your happiness is based on life circumstances, like being married or divorced, rich or poor, healthy or ill. That leaves 40% that we can directly effect. She gives research to back up these numbers. The remainder of the book is about ways to improve that 40% of our happiness we have control over, activities we can do to become happier. There are several "quizzes" in the book to help you find your current happiness level, and find which happiness strategies will play to your strengths....

Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport

April 5, 2019April 12, 2019 by Carol12 Comments

The blurb gives a clear idea of what Digital Minimalism is all about. We've become addicted to social media/binge-watching/videogames. And our ever present smartphones are just increasing our dependence. Newport advocates stepping away from all social media for 30 days and then only add things that truly enhance your life, and even those need to be added cautiously and perhaps with rules attached. He makes some really great points although not revolutionary. I actually like the parts about what to do instead of endlessly scrolling and liking most. I already know I need to spend less time on my phone, but I like the suggestions he has. He stresses the importance of solitude. He wants us to learn new skills and make/fix things. We need to actually interact with people, preferably in person, but an actual phone conversation, not texting, is good too. I listened to this, ironically enough, via the Audible App on my phone. I think I need to pick...

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson

June 5, 2018 by Carol2 Comments

I probably shouldn't have read The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, since I can't actually say the title out loud, but I kept seeing it around and the audio was the prefect length for a couple of drives I made last weekend. I really liked the first part of the book. Basically, the media and internet and the world want us to care about everything, but that's not the way to a happy, fulfilling life. You need to choose what you care about, what values really matter to you. Manson shares thoughts that while not original are true, like pain and struggle are unavoidable; facing hard truths about ourselves helps us grow; and failure, as so long as we learn from it, can lead to success; that sometimes just doing something is better than waiting for inspiration. I got a little bored towards the end. A lot of the book is repetitious and his anecdotes can get a little annoying. Maybe...