1. All children alarm their parents, if only because you are forever expecting them to figure out you actually have no idea what you’re doing.
2. Show me a good loser and I will show you a person who wasn’t playing to win.
3. Life is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs at one time. (Sometimes it tastes great, sometimes it makes you want to puke.)
4. Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy taking care of their own lives and staying out of politics.
5. I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine kids and a career.
6. It is impossible to think of any good meal, no matter how plain or elegant, without pasta or onions in it.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to playing board games, tomorrow my plans include watching kids bowl and Sunday, I want to go grocery shopping after church.